This past month has been an incredibly difficult one. I was in two minds whether or not to write this, but I said from the beginning that I would share everything, the good, the bad and the ugly! This has also propelled me in to action and given me more confidence!
Back in July we had the devastating news that one of my sisters was terminally ill with cancer. It all felt just so unfair, as my sister had been adopted when she was 10 weeks old and my Mum was only 17. I had always known about my sister and in 2005 I had the best phone call in the world! My sister had found us! I also found out I had a niece who was a little younger than me! It was amazing!
In 2012 my sister was diagnosed with Breast Cancer, she underwent treatment and was given the all clear! Unfortunately for it to return and this time, it was to claim her life! She had come in to our lives, only to be taken away again! Over Christmas she became ill and went in to hospital. In January she was still in hospital and it wasn't looking good. I had a phone call from my Niece on a Monday night, I cancelled all my work for the next day and travelled 2 hours to the hospital to spend the day with my sister!
Being self-employed I couldn't afford to take too much time off and had to go back to work! My sister deteriorated and I had planned to go up again on Monday 16th Feb. However, unfortunately she went in to the hospice the Friday before and rapidly went downhill! She became a beautiful angel at 8.10am on Tuesday 17th Feb! I cancelled all my work for the rest of the week and travelled the 4 hours to be with my Mum.
I knew where I needed and wanted to be, unfortunately I also knew where I had to be. They were not the same place! I had to really battle with myself, knowing I wanted to be with my Mum and family, but knew I had to be back at home working! It killed me so much. I never, ever want to be in that position again!
My sister was an incredible lady, full of positive energy and life. Always thinking of others before herself. When she got her diagnosis, she decided to jump out of a plane to raise money for the hospital. A truly inspirational woman! Her attitude was 'What's the worst that can happen?'
That is so true with everything though! What IS the worst that can happen? Since her passing and the awful battle I fought with myself, I made a decision. I decided that I will absolutely never be in that horrid situation again, having to choose work over being with family.
I thought, what's the worst that can happen, and I opened my mouth and spoke to people. I wasn't shy and timid, I wasn't scared they would say no, or not be interested. I opened my mouth and talked to them. I was completely honest with people and I also told them why I was doing this business.
Last week I shared the products and business with 10 people! I have friends booking parties, ordering products and I am even talking to the 'scary, dreaded cold market' I am getting in to action. I am not scared of asking questions anymore. What's the worst that can happen? I am not scared to a little bit more encouraging... What's the worst that can happen? I am not scared to be honest... What's the worst that can happen?
So, when you are standing there, talking to someone, or you are in a shop, restaurant, play centre, and you see someone and think, 'Oh I would love to speak to them' Please remember... 'what's the worst can happen?' Then, open your mouth and speak!
Just before I finish this blog something else I want to share. My sister had said that she always felt she as a butterfly, she had a strong connection to them. She told my niece and her best friend 'If you ever see a butterfly, that's me' also, her favourite colour was purple! So, can you imagine how it felt, when the doors opened after her service and the most amazing purple butterfly came fluttering in and flew all around the room!
Love you and miss you always my beautiful butterfly!
